Truth in advertising

Some people keep trying to push for truth in advertising. You know, not letting any exaggerated claims or untruths make their way into that little jingle or blurb that gets written to entice you into buying something you really don't need or to hide the true conditions of the item in question. Sometimes though the push for truth in advertising might go a little too far. Case in point:

Original advertisement:

For Rent: Cute, 1 1/2 BR, 1 BA white farmhouse tucked away on quiet country lot. Easy access to major medical center and highways providing access to suburban amenities, as well as a walking trail/bike path. Pleasantly nestled between two large agricultural fields, providing sunset views and scenic surroundings. Street address lends itself to unique and interesting blog titles and nearby pond provides rare glimpse at aquatic wildlife in the midst of suburban neighborhood. Charming plaster walls and original fixtures (including bathtub and doors/doorhandles) lend an aura of reminiscence for days gone by. Large yard suitable for gardening and playing croquet or volleyball. Tenant responsible for lawn care and all utilities except water.


Truth in advertising:

For Rent: Cute, 1 1/2 BR, 1BA white farmhouse tucked away on what seems to be a quiet country lot. It's fortunate that there is a major medical center nearby, as frequent accidents will occur at all hours of the day and night, so be prepared to have 911 on speed dial. This includes major car accidents and wipeouts by 10 year olds screaming bloody murder when they fall off their bike tearing down the hill. Easy access to major connecting routes means that everyone and their brother will know where your house is, and will often comment on such things as - "oh, I was just driving by your house the other day, and noticed you use Dawn dish detergent. Isn't it great?" Pleasantly nestled between two agricultural fields which provide pleasant views, scenic sunsets, and plenty of small rodents to inhabit your house when the corn's cut down, and hundreds of flies in January when they fertilize the fields (not to mention the pleasant aroma that goes with it). Occasional blown power line transformers may set the field on fire, which lends itself to a chance to meet your neighbors and for acquiring new dents in your car.

Street address lends itself to interesting and unique blog titles, and nearby pond frequently floods with heavy rain, thereby blocking your road to through traffic. Charming plaster walls fall apart whenever you try to hang even a calendar, plaster ceilings that crumble when pipes leak, and doorknobs that fall off at every turn are par for the course. A leaking bathtub necessitates replacement of the entire bathroom, as hardware stores don't like to reminisce about days gone by. Large yard suitable for playing croquet and volleyball, except when cars flip and overturn in the middle of the croquet lawn. Better take out extra life and health insurance, because you'll need it when you mow the lawn.

In case you're wondering where to call to rent this lovely villa ~ sorry, but it's already taken :) By two highly intelligent, charming, funny, creative, and stunningly beautiful women. And that, my friends, is truth in advertising.

Enough already!

Ok, I think God is trying to tell me something. For some reason James 1 has been on my mind for a few weeks. And every time I go to something where there's a testimony, the person mentions James 1. And tonight as I was sitting around waiting for Joanna to call me about where we're going to dinner, I thought I'd catch up on some blogs. One of Joanna's recommended blogs is Jeneric Jeneralities, so I thought I'd catch up on it. And guess what she mentions??? I'll give you 3 guesses, the first 3 don't count.

so here, for your reading pleasure, is James 1:

James 1

1James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ,
To the twelve tribes scattered among the nations:
Greetings.

Trials and Temptations

2Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. 6But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; 8he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.

9The brother in humble circumstances ought to take pride in his high position. 10But the one who is rich should take pride in his low position, because he will pass away like a wild flower. 11For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plant; its blossom falls and its beauty is destroyed. In the same way, the rich man will fade away even while he goes about his business.

12Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.

13When tempted, no one should say, "God is tempting me." For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; 14but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. 15Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.

16Don't be deceived, my dear brothers. 17Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. 18He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created.

Listening and Doing

19My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, 20for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. 21Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you.

22Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. 23Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror 24and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. 25But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it—he will be blessed in what he does.

26If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless. 27Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.